Five Whole Years

Five years ago, I was settling into my first (very cold) days at home with a brand new baby. Watching the snow fall through the window and wondering what on earth I was letting myself in for.

Yesterday I was helping my daughter recover from Saturday's On The Day Frozen birthday party spectacular, and trying to interest her in a light snooze after swimming and a soft play lunch.  Today, she's packed off to school as if nothing ever happened.

Five. How on earth has that happened? I've been trusted with the well-being of a small, dependent human being for 5 years, and have managed not to break her.  She's done her best to break me, mind.

The cold never bothered me anyway

We even managed snow, she's convinced that it snows for her birthday, because it's her birthday, every year. Even when experience has showed it only snows about every OTHER year, and despite her best Frozen singalong efforts, there was nowhere near enough to build a snowman, though it did look the part.

The melting Olaf biscuits went down a treat with the hoard of marauding 5 year olds who invaded my living room, and somehow the only casualties were one of my fingernails and a slight spillage of orange squash onto a mat that was down for exactly that reason.

Happy birthday little lovely.

Princess Batarella

Welcome to this special edition of Celebrities at Home.  Today, we are joining Princess Batarella in her special woodland retreat.  Come with us, and enter the world of the Princess.

Meet Mr Pump.  Mr Pump stands sentry at the entrance to Princess Batarella's magical home, ensuring that only those lucky few invited guests are permitted entry.  Woe betide anyone who tried to make their way past Mr Pump without permission.  Their fate is one that few would wish to behold.

Once past the gates, we meet the Princess herself.  Princess Batarella loves to groom her pony.  This magnificent steed is Princess Batarella's loyal companion, and accompanies her on regular tours of her woodland home, helping to negotiate the rough terrain and carrying all the essentials a Princess may need.

Princess Batarella shares her dwelling with a host of fairy folk.  Whilst shy, some of them will show themselves, given encouragement from the Princess.  The fairies put a lot of work into maintaining their domain, and each has cultivated her own garden to provide all the things a fairy community may need.

And after all that work touring her domain, there is nothing a Princess likes more than to tuck into a freshly toasted marshmallow.  Grown by the fairies, and toasted over a magical flame, of course.

OK, just kidding.  Our pumpkin at home, an excursion to Mountain View Ranch to join in their half term bushcraft festivities (in Hallowe'en costume, naturally), and a sneaky roadsign from Neath.  Just because.

Princess Batarella's tour is linking up with Coombe Mills' Country Kids linky.  Are you?

School Days

I'm sure it wasn't like this when I was in school. It feels like there's a "day" for everything, and of course, every "day" demands a donation. They're all good and worthy causes, but how many contributions is it reasonable to expect?  That's in addition to the cost of putting together a costume for most events, and the other payments that seem to be inextricably linked to so-called free education.

It was Roald Dahl day last week. (Aside from the fact I could have sworn it was actually a couple of weeks earlier), dress up as a character from a Roald Dahl book, pay £1 to do so, and then pay more to buy chocolate at inflated prices in school.  Because of course, I have so many Roald Dahl costumes just knocking around the house!

Veruca Salt, with her Golden Ticket

Then in a couple of weeks, there's a "monster ball". Pay £1 for a ticket, dress up, oh and can you donate all your old dress up costumes to school so we can rent them out. (Alternatively, why not buy a job lot the first week in November, like I did last year?)  And then the Christmas show, with costumes and tickets to buy. And the Christmas party, with another contribution. And the class trip to see Santa somewhere cold and expensive. Children in Need will be coming up soon, and a million others.  Fruit money at the start of term, photos for this, that and the other...

Where does it all end though?  It's not so bad for a household like ours where both parents are working.  OK it's not easy for anyone these days, but a pound or so, a quick costume grab from the local supermarket doesn't add too much strain to the weekly budget.  But what about those families who aren't so well off?  We live in an area with higher than average unemployment levels, lower than average wages, and a lot of people struggling just to make ends meet from one week to the next.  All these little contributions here and there soon add up.  Children, especially of Squeaky's age, don't understand why they can't take part alongside their friends.

The payments are of course "contributions" according to the letters.  But they don't seem quite so voluntary by the nagging texts that come via the secretary's office to my phone and that of all the other parents, whether we've paid or not.  I spend my working days with families struggling to put food on the table and having to go without basics because their money simply won't stretch that far, so to see them being pushed further still is very hard to watch.

Does your school want to get involved with everything? Should there be a line?  Let me know.

Is There Any Room At The Inn?

It's Squeaky's first ever school play in a fortnight.  And just like everything else school-related she's reluctant to tell me anything about it.  At All.  I think they must make them sign the Official Secrets Act when they start, either that or she's got a great future ahead of her as an international spy - MI5 wouldn't be able to get any information out of her, even under extreme tickling, she won't give an inch!

I know the play is nativity-ish, because we've got a cast list, so we know what costumes we need to supply for our budding Oscar winners.  I can't help but feel a little sorry for the camels' parents, because that's really not an easy costume to rustle up at home from the contents of various wardrobes & dressing up boxes (though I have seen a few available online!).  And I know the play is called "Jump If You Love Christmas", which sounds bizarre to say the least.  "Sit Down If You Wish It Was January" for the Bah Humbugs in the audience, perhaps?

An Innkeeper?

Well, La Squeak is an Innkeeper.  Innkeeper 3 to be precise (that's the one with the stable, if you were wondering!)  It's a role I remember playing myself in the dim & distant past, along with a gymnast (obviously at the nativity), the colour pink, and Mrs Red Hat from the Village With Three Corners.  As you can tell, I've had a wide and varied theatrical career, sadly cut short at the point where it was discovered I had no acting talent whatsoever.

An Innkeeper?

An Innkeeper though?  What DOES an innkeeper actually wear?  In the name of research, I paid a visit to our local, and discovered that an aging t-shirt from the brewery teamed with a pair of dubiously stained jeans, and a couple of tattoos seems to be a popular choice.  I could probably manage that.  Or there's the more famous options.  Bald head, burgundy jacket & pint pot a la Al Murray?  Leopard print, big hair, cleavage & too much make up in the style of Bet Lynch?  Apparently these aren't ideal suggestions and are more likely to be met with a referral to social services than a standing ovation.

A more appropriate Inn Keeper?

The internet leads me to believe that an innkeeper's costume is pretty much the same as a shepherd's, only without the sheep & crook (I might have to add a tankard, that would be fair, right?)   I quite like the look of this one, from Angels Fancy Dress - with a little adaptation, maybe a belt, my little Innkeeper could be the star of the show!

I still think Bet Lynch would be fun though.

Well, I was thinking aloud on twitter before I wrote this post, and the kind people at Angels Fancy Dress contacted me, and asked if I thought my readers would like a little offer?  Well, of course you do.  So, they've offered you all an amazing 10% off any item at Angels Fancy Dress - not just their Nativity Costumes.  All you have to do is use the discount code SQUEAKY10 which is valid on online orders until 31st December. Perfect for your Christmas or New Year's parties as well!  What are you waiting for?

Disclosure: This post was written without request. I have not received payment for this post.  I asked whether the company would like to be linked in my post, and they offered a discount for readers. Links are provided for convenience, I will not receive reward for their use, nor use of the above discount code.