Bleedin' 'eck

We're at it again.  I really thought we'd turned a corner.  But today I got an email from Squeaky Daddy saying that she'd had a mega nosebleed in the car on the way to nursery. Great.  And then when I got to nursery, I found her in a spare t-shirt, because she'd been sitting with some of the other children on the carpet, and had another huge nosebleed.  For once she wasn't even picking it!

Now the second one is probably just a continuation of the first, it tends to go like that.  But we'd gone over 2 months without a single nosebleed, and even that one was tiny and dealt with in moments.  And now we're back to a bleedy square one.  Almost all her previous nosebleeds, with the exception of accidents, have been at night, and judging by the evidence, due to picking her nose in her sleep.   But spontaneous daytime nosebleeds are something new.  I've never (to my knowledge, mum please don't tell the world otherwise!) had a nosebleed, and while I technically know what to do, it's still kind of unpleasant.

Any other secret midnight nosepickers? Or general little bleeders?  Aside from keeping her nails very very short, I'm not sure what else to do.

Pull Your Finger Out!

A two parter.

Part 1 - a mini rant.  How long does it take a flaming solicitor to get the searches done on our (potential) new house? I want it NOW, not some indistinct point in the future. NOW dammit!

Part 2. Squeaky is a nose-picker, as are many kids her age. We do the best we can to discourage her from this in the daytime, but we have a bigger problem. She picks her nose in her sleep. To the extent that she gives herself nosebleeds.  There's something quite horrifying about being greeted by a bloodstained toddler at 6-something in the morning.  Aside from keeping her nails short, has anyone got any suggestions what we can do?  HELP!!

My Red House

MyRed House is a recently launched website from RedHouse, the children's book publisher.  It's an interactive website, designed to provide an online home for parents who want to encourage a love of reading in their children.

That sounded like my kind of thing, to say I'm a book lover is an understatement, books take up an awful lot of my house (and time), and I really want to encourage Squeaky to enjoy books in the same way.  I try to mix up the books that we read together, so there's new books, modern classics, and older stories that stand the test of time (or sometimes don't!)  Variety is the spice of life, so they say, and it keeps me amused to move from Peppa Pig to Hans Christian Andersen!

MyRed House is a little bit of everything.  There's live interviews with children's authors, including big names such as Jacqueline Wilson who is joining them on 7th February, and the opportunity for children and parents to send in their questions to the authors.  The interviews are streamed live, and available to watch on demand if you miss them on the day.  There's a blog, a what's on guide for book events in your area, a forum to share your own questions, thoughts & experiences, and the chance to ask the Red House team for suggestions of books for you & your children, whatever their interests or reading levels.

My favourite section though, is Learn, a whole online resource of advice & information for every stage of your child's reading journey, with activities, advice, recipes (yes, recipes) and book suggestions for both parents and children. There's even suggestions relating to specific life events that children may be going through at that age (potty training & fussy eaters are both very relevant in this house!)

The site is still fairly new, so elements such as the forum are quite sparse at the moment, and the number of events local to you varies depending on where you live - you're fine in the South-East, but as is often the case it's a bit quiet over in Wales, Northern Ireland and the South West.  That said, again, as the site grows events will come up.  Keep checking!

MyRed House is a site that will continue to grow, but an interactive resource is only as good as the users who interact with it.  I posted recently about parents turning to the internet for advice rather than more traditional sources such as family & reference books, My Red House is a link between old and new. Sometimes a book is more rewarding, but it can't have the answer to everything, which is where the interactive element comes in.

Where do you go for advice?

Where do you go?  Every mum has questions, niggles, worries.  Who do you turn to for advice, support, or a reality check?

Every child under 5 in the UK should have a named health visitor.  They're specialists in children's health & development and are trained not to laugh when you ask them daft questions (I should know, I've asked some corkers!)  But the reality is, each health visitor has a big caseload, they've got loads of families to see, and they're only available certain times.  And while some of them are fabulous, they're human, and there can be clashes, or other reasons why they're not always the first port of call.

Our own mums and families?  A generation or two ago, Granny would have been there, on the doorstep, any time night or day.  People move though, I live about 150 miles from my mum, and while she's on the phone, she's got her own life to lead as well, so mums can't always turn to their families for help.

Local Mums?  Mum & baby groups can be a huge source of support, and coffee!  They're not for everyone, and they're not everywhere, but groups can fill the gaps left by moving away from family.

Where does the 21st century mum go, then?  Here's a clue... you're doing it right now.

The Toddler Census revealed that an amazing 80% of new mums turn to google, facebook, and online forums for parenting advice!  That's incredible!  Sites such as Netmums & Mumsnet have a wealth of reference materials as well as advice forums, chat (and a bit of gossip), it's just a case of finding the site that best fits your personality, or preferred amount of swearing!

There's a few differences among us, though.  71 % of older mums (like me. I'm ancient) - those over 35 - were likely to turn to the internet for advice, but more under 25's use Facebook for their queries than any other group (15%, the average a mere 9%).

I'm not sure what turning to Facebook really entails - and that interpretation could well apply to the answers in the census too - does a status update of "Oh For Goodness Sake child, SLEEP!" constitute seeking advice, or is it just venting?  Depends on whether you get answers, I guess!

Apparently 75% of Southampton mums turn to their own friends & family for support, while 47% of their Plymouth sisters turn to forums.  21% of Brighton mums seek help from their Facebook friends, and 10% of London mums rely on YouTube.  And apparently that's not relying on YouTube for videos of the Tombliboos brushing their teeth, Mr Bloom singing Meet The Veggies, or a cat falling off a washing machine.



So, tell me.  Who do you speak to?  Me?  A little bit of all of them.  I work with a couple of Health Visitors, even though they're not my daughter's named HV, so I do ask them.  I ask my mum, my mummy friends that go to the same groups as me, forums, blogs, parenting books, magazines.  There's plenty of advice out there, just find the ones that fit you.

More info can be found at  www.growingupmilkfo.com  pop along, they're lovely!


Cow & Gate Growing Up Milk are sponsoring me to attend the CybHer conference in May 2012.  The statistical data in this post came from The Toddler Census, a questionnaire answered by over 1000 parents in July 2011.

What can your Family Information Service do for you?

I was recently invited to join a parents/carers panel for my local Family Information Service, and it got me to thinking, what do they actually DO?  And despite me being famous/infamous enough to be invited, I wasn't really sure myself.  What better excuse to find out, and to share a bit of information with the world at large?

First things first.  The Family Information Service is a statutory service in England & Wales.  That means that wherever you live in England or Wales, your local authority HAS to have a Family Information Service.  If you're in Scotland or Northern Ireland, similar services exist, though they may have other names.  Elsewhere in the world, I'm afraid you're on your own for this one.

The Family Information Service are a "one-stop-shop" for any kind of information for your family (the clue's in the name). Looking for details of local childminders?  Out-of-school services? Youth clubs for a teenager?  Give the Family Information Service a call.  Maybe you've got a child with a disability and you're looking for some advice, or other parents in a similar situation. They can point you in the direction of someone who can help.

The Family Information Service don't provide all these things themselves, but they're a central point to find out what's out there in your local area, and to get information about services, support, events, groups, etc.  And if you're involved with a group, make sure your local Family Information Service have got the details, they can't give your information out if they haven't got it!  It's a great way to get new people involved, or if you're looking to expand a service, you can find out where there's gaps in other services at the moment (anyone who wants to set up an open-access playgroup around Merthyr Tydfil on a Wednesday, that'd be brilliant, and you'd have roughly no competition!)

The panel was really useful, in terms of finding out about things I didn't know, and finding out other parents' experiences.  It's like many aspects of parenting (and blogging, come to think of it), we all feel like we're on our own, and we're the only person to have faced this issue/made this mistake, and then we talk to someone else, and find we're all in the same situation after all.  I'm excited to be part of our Family Information Service panel, and hope we can make a real difference in improving the range of information available to people, and the number of people the information reaches.  One thing we identified is how marginalised you can feel as a working parent, so much attention is given to those who are out-of-work, that there's very few groups, informal provision or support available outside office hours.  If that's the impact we have, it'll be very positive for a lot of people. 


Oh, I mentioned events, right?  That's something our Family Information Service do too.  They run a Family Fun Day every year, getting lots of the agencies working with families in the area together to hold a day of fun in the sunshine, with arts, crafts, games, competitions, face painting, a great chance to get an idea of the range of services available (and also really, really good fun!)

So, that's the Family Information Service.  Have you used yours? Give them a call, they'd love to hear from you.